A4 - A Hobbit By a Foot

As we got back to the circled wagons, the Bree men were already packing for departure. “The hobbit was captured and probably eaten. No reason we should stick around. Leave now while they are leaderless.” Rambler and Brackrog argue for a delay, “Till dusk. Give us time to rescue the hobbit and we’ll join you as additional guards. Leave now and you’re on your own, exposed. From what I saw, you weren’t doing so well before we arrived.” OK, dusk but not a minute later. As the adventurers depart for the cave, Ladee overhears a mumbled comment from the wagoneers, “Hell with sticking around as they stir the nest, I say take advantage of them keeping the goblins occupied and get the hell away.”

Ladee has already donned goblin outfit in case he’ll need to sneak into the cave. Rowlie appraises the goblin, “Tell me again how you expect to see in the pitch black cave, like goblins can?” So it is, Rambler sneaks ahead as scout with his night-vision. Brackrog, also with night-vision, is next 30ft behind leading the human and hobbit. Once inside the cave, Ladee lights a torch with light stretching just beyond Rambler to aid his vision in the black and silent cave. Pause at a downward slope as Ladee anchors a rope, “For the climb up and out of here.”

Brackrog quickly learns Ramblers’ hand-signals calling halt as he comes back to report. A fork: the right is level and more traveled; the left slopes down. Rowlie sniffs the damp air, “Left where it is more cool and appropriate for a kitchen where the hobbit apparently labors. Right now all I smell is goblin sweat and dung.” Rambler complains, “I hate enclosures. More suited for outdoors and the forest. The sooner we find the hair-footed-shrimp, the faster I get out of this hell-hole.” We soon come upon another fork: the left foul with stench and large footprints. We go right (Rambler is mapping the turns on his arm). “Shit.” Rambler points out 2-foot holes near the ceiling covered in webs. Rowlie and Brackrog concerned we could get caught between spiders and goblins.

We continue, coming upon a cave-in but just enough opening for Ladee to investigate beyond. Deadend. We backtrack past the large prints to the first fork, where we take the right passage. Rambler soon pauses at the sound of guards near a widening area, noting they pass a bottle between their swaying postures.

A rope hangs near, possibly to sound alarm. Our surprise arrow attack quickly drops them; fortune at Rambler’s critical hits as Brackrog is still learning his bow and arrow skills.

We continue along a long passage and sharp left coming to a room full of crates with mumbling echoing forth along with wafts of cooked food. You’d think Dindy would be elated at our presence, “Sorry, but I’m anchored here as cook.” As Rambler stoops to work on the ancient leg-irons, Ladee comforts him, “Don’t worry. If Ram can’t get it off, we can cut off your foot and still rescue you.” Dindy faints at the suggestion.

Rambler stands, “No use. Beyond my skills. We’ll need the key.” A goblin voice echoes, “Too quiet in there hobbitize. Get to work else I cook you.” Ladee steps into the role as the others hide for surprise, “I quit. I won’t be caught cooking this slop.”

Lumbering grows louder till a goblin appears, and is quickly subdued by the others. No Key. Dindy is just gaining consciousness when we hide the body in a crate, “What have you done?!” And faints again. Rambler slaps him awake, “Stay here as we find the damn key.”

Down another passage. Two more guards wide awake. Our surprise ranged attacks barely wound the now ready goblins with drawn blades. We close into melee where Rambler cleaves each with his twin blades. Still no key, so we continue along the passage to another fork. The left proves to be a wine-cellar while the right opens to a large cavern strewn with goblins; lit lanterns lining the walls. 50+ passed out drunk. 5 goblins drain the last keg while their leader (HUGE blob of a goblin) lazes in a makeshift throne, partaking of his own keg.

Particularly strange is their dress, each wearing pieces of hobbit clothing as if to mock their newest cook. Of interest is the leader wearing a jacket split at the back, a key dangling from his breast pocket.

Per Rowlie, “Give them another 10 minutes. Maybe they’ll pass out too.” Grunts and gestures prove the leader’s keg is empty and he calls for the others to replenish. Being ignored, he pulls out a whip, snares a smaller goblin around his neck, and drags him into range where he pummels the thing…fist thru his face! Ladee has his own plan: dressed as goblin, he enters the wine-cellar to lift a small keg. Then enters the goblin lair. Grunts and gestures convince Ladee to bring the keg to the leader. Grunts by the other goblins wanting some for themselves. Hoping it a distraction, Ladee reaches for the key…and misses!

That’s when Rambler’s arrow sinks into the leader’s shoulder. Growls and a backhand toward Ladee as the brute rises, sounding alarm. More friendly arrows give Ladee a 2nd chance: he grabs the key and runs. But not far enough; 2 goblins close on him as the other 2 close on Rambler. The leader’s whip cuts into Ladee while the drunken small goblins stab…with cutlery…forks! Brackrog’s aim has improved as his arrows find their mark. Ladee runs for it, risking melee attacks. He survives to run past his allies; his intent to free Dindy. Rambler, now in melee with the leader, thinks otherwise, “Damn stinking hobbit is leaving us.”

Maybe the distraction caused him to let-down-his-guard: the leader smacks Rambler a vicious blow. The woodsman falls unconscious. Even Brackrog’s knees wobble from a vicious strike, but he still stands. Rowlie charges in with torch and flask of oil splashed on the leader, who drops. And that’s when 20+ drunk goblins begin to stir. Brackrog lifts Rambler over his shoulder and exits the cavern, encountering Ladee and Dindy coming toward them. ‘Healer Hands’ has Rambler back on his feet as the group retraces their steps. Thanks to Rambler’s map on his forearm. The rope at the entrance proves necessary for the climb and fatigue from running.

It’s already dusk when they reach the wagon camp, now deserted. Howls echo through the mountains and trees, proving the goblins are awake and pissed. But the howls stay distant; apparently angered but currently leaderless. The group soon catches up with the wagons. It’s days before they arrive in Boerning territory. Dindy welcomed by his brother Dody and sister-in-law. It’s hours before Dody realizes the wagon full of goods is missing.